The one in which Lisa looses her damn mind.

So, see that wee little time stamp down there? the one that starts with a 5, and ends with AM?? Right. That's because I'm writing this in the middle of the damn night!! With half the damn light in the house on, and Dora playing on the TV. WHY? you ask!? That's crazy talk you say!? Why yes, yes it is. But I am at the end of my damn wits. That's all there is to it. I've been up since 3 with Mason. Again.

Sunday night, I had the flu. Up half the night praying to the porcelain gods to take me away. Monday night, Mason gets the flu, up half the night trying to soothe his fever and tummy. Tuesday night, Mason has a night terror, up half the night trying to get him back to sleep. Wednesday night Mason has nightmares half the damn night, up trying to soothe him back to sleep. Thursday night, Mason just doesn't FEEL like fucking sleeping anymore, and would far rather drive me batshit crazy. Every night he wakes up, and begs for a drink...and so ask me, how many juice cups I can find now!? OH! That's right. ZERO! None. Not one. The closest I can find is a rubbermaid juice box...those are Not spill proof. I'm sitting in apple juice. I can't even find a damn cup!!! And my damn house is pretty damn clean!!

Mason is 2 years and 36 days old today. Which equals about 766 days. And do you know how many of those 766 Nights I have slept through??? About 14. Yeah...2 fucking weeks out of 2 fucking years.

i don't know what else to try. He has a regular bedtime routine, at roughly the same time each night. He gets a snack and a drink before bed. He still can't make it through the day without a nap...but I'm wondering if I should try keeping him awake all day??? I tried to give him a Melatonin when he woke up at 11:30 tonight(The first time he woke up.) He would have NO part of it. And I'm quite sure that if I try to hide it in something like a spoonful of peanut butter, that he'll just spit it out. If I let him just cry it out(which he wouldn't, he'd Scream bloody murder) he'll make himself sick...trust me, I've tried. I think I'll go to the health food store tonight to see about getting liquid Melatonin. I can just add that to his juice if I ever find his damn cups again.

hmm...I completely caved and gave him some Gravol about 30 minutes ago...and he seems to be drifting off...but now it's almost 5AM, and Al's going to be up any minute, stomping around the kitchen. So, while Mason may be able to sleep through that with the help of the Gravol...I'm stuck watching Dora, listening to Al swear at the things he drops, and throw things into his cooler for his lunch.

I don't know. I just don't know what to think or where to go from here. Mason's such a Mommy's boy...I'm afraid to take him to someone else's house for a weekend and say here...you do it for a couple nights while I get my shit together. Because that hardly seems fair. He just screams even louder if Al tries to do anything for him...because for 2 years it has Always been me to get up with him. But if I don't find an answer soon, I'm not going to be able to function at a level I need to. Especially at work, where I kinda of need to keep my shit together in order to prevent H from getting ahead of the game with me.

Okay, I'm starting to get a headache. because why wouldn't I right?! top it all off like a cherry and whipcream. I guess I'd better take off these whiney pants and get on with the day. I'd like to say sorry for the whining, but hey, my blog, my right to whine if I want to.

lisa

20 Answers...

Not that you've asked the questions...but here are the answers anyway!! :)

1. I have sensory issues with Cotton. As in cotton balls. If there's cotton in a bottle of pills...I can NOT touch it. I've even had to get pharmacists to pull it out for me. I get severe tremors in my fingers and arms if I touch it. Even thinking about it gives me the shakes. yuck.

2. I'm slightly allergic to the adhesive in band aids. It leaves big red patches on my skin.

3. I can not tolerate adult cough medicine, it turns my stomach. The only kind I can have without feeling ill is children's Triaminic. I usually just suffer through my coughs though.

4. My 2 biggest nervous habits are tucking my hair behind my ears, and I unconsciously pick at the skin along the side of my thumbs. If my thumbs are red and raw...it's been a bad day :)

5. I can NOT stand being able to hear people chew.

6. If I'm not talking to you, but am cleaning...I am REALLY angry with you for something...buy flowers.

7. My shoe size ranges from 8-9

8. I cry when I read sad books, and when I watch sad movies...also during some commercials :)

9. I usually wander while I talk on the phone. Try to stay out of my way.

10. I play my music too loud sometimes...especially when I'm in the van, or cleaning.

11. I like my coffee really hot, with 2 sweeteners and cream. If there's no cream, I'll take it with just the sweeteners. (Splenda please)

12. Once I have the kids in bed, I need a good 20-30 minutes to unwind...feel free to bring me tea...and snacks :)

13. I have no trouble eating an entire bag of baby carrots, fresh green beans, Sour cream and onion chips, or microwave popcorn. (But never at the same time LOL)

14. I'm not big on candy.

15. I prefer Table Syrup to Maple Syrup. I'll eat my pancakes with just butter on them if there's only Maple Syrup.

16. I hate shopping for myself, and am Always second guessing what I've bought.

17. I talk to my Mom on the phone almost once a day. If I haven't talked to her in a couple days, I get grouchy :) Conversations are hardly ever less than an hour.

18. I'd really love to own a Pontiac Solstice someday.

19. I don't know how to whistle.

20. I am very sad that I don't own any Tracy Chapman CD's. Also, Jann Arden, the latest Norah Jones("Not Too Late"), and also Metallica.

~Lisa~

Boring.

I'm soooo boring!!!! I swear, I don't know why I can't get on here more often!! Things have happened that are totally blog worthy! Aidan started school on Tuesday!! JK :) he's sooo excited about it. Except for one thing...he was Very upset on the first day when he found out he had to leave his new shoes at school!! LOL...he cried all the way home over that!

Jenna seems to be doing well in grade 1. I haven't really had any chance to talk to her teacher at all, so I guess I'll go with no news is good news. She's happy with her classmates, in with lots of friends from previous years :)

Work is going okay. H is being a bit of a brat...but I honestly Don't think it's the Autism. I think it's the fact that he's almost 7, he's an only child, and he's a boy!! I was nearly pulling my hair out for a couple weeks, but he came around a little today and actually PLAYED (A skill he had lost for a few months) so we're all really happy about that :)

Al's doing good. going to the gym 3 nights a week, and working as hard as ever. He's working weekends now too, hoping to make enough extra to do some additional reno's around the house. I'm sure the renos will be nice, but being a single parent again isn't so much fun at times. But, it's not permanent. :)

I'm doing okay as well. In a bit of a funk. Tired of being broke. Tired of being tired. Tired of waiting for my turn to be here. You know how it goes :) But I'm sure that in time everything will fall into place, and I'll get my chance to shine :)

Hope Y'all are doing well!!

JULIE BO BOLIE!!

I saw these and IMMEDIAELY thought of YOU!!!!!! LMAO!!!

http://www.shoesonashoestring.com/ProductPage.aspx?Style=MAMMOTH.CRO&colorcode=KHAKI%20OATMEAL&dept=FOOTWEAR&brand=CROCS&isFromCart=False&couponcode=PPCCROCS&gclid=CPb-26HPr44CFVB1OAod0lOzaA

You love me, go ahead, you can say it :)

Lisa

On the upside!

I'm so happy to report that Mason is finally starting to be a better boy to be around :) His constant crying seems to have decreased, his vocabulary seems to be growing every day (Finally!!), and he's just happier in general! He's fallen in love with Dora. Which pleases me to no end because it's given me a barganing tool!! Do this, and you can watch Dora! Stop crying and you can watch Dora! It's lovely!

Jenna started grade one yesterday!! I can't believe it!! This is it...when the kids start getting cool, or not cool. When the attitudes from their friends really come shining through (For instance, one of the first things Jenna said this morning? "It's really freakin' raining out there!" WHAT!?! oh no no no my love!! She was sooo nervous about starting grade one!! For DAYS she talked about how nervous she was, and nothing I said could soothe those nerves :( But!! She's in a class with the best grade 1 teacher in our school, she's with her best girlfriend, and the boy she's been in love with since she was 1 :) So I'm really hoping for a good year for her :) Fingers crossed. What I'm not looking forward to is that the routine is Every day now!! I've had it easy for the past two years...going every other day! not anymore!!

And to add to that excitement!! Aidan starts Junior Kindergarten this year!! I am SO excited for him. He's been ready to go to school since last year! It's strange, I was really nervous about Jenna going to school when she started. But not Aidan! I think because he's so outgoing, and so confident. He's far more advanced than Jenna was when she started; I think we were happy that she knew how to print her name...Aidan can do that, plus mosst of the alphabet, plus he knows all his letters by sight, and he knows all their sounds fairly well (Thank you LeapFrog Letter Factory video!)...Jenna was sooo not there by JK! I'm also excited for him to talk someone else's ear off all day long :) That boy always has something to say about everything!! And if he doesn't know...he'll make it up :) Yesterday, we were walking to get Jenna from school, and he was telling me all about how he has the best teacher in the world, and that she's lucky because he's in her class and he's such a funny boy. and he just went on and on about how great she was.....problem is....he's NEVER met her!! LOL We go tomorrow to meet her, and see his classroom, and then he starts next Tuesday. I'm so happy :)

So, that's the kid update for ya! Off to work I go now :) have a great one!
Lisa