A no good, very bad, terrifying, morning.

This post is awful. If you're having a sad day, probably don't ready it.

My kids went missing this morning. Jenna and Aidan. I went next door to give my neighbour something. I took Mason with me. I came home 2 minutes later. My house was empty. I called. And called, and called. I went outside and called. I went in the back yard and called. Nothing. Silence has never sounded so excruciatingly painful.

I ran back to K's house, and she called 911 for me, and watched Mason while I drove around the block. Nothing. Not a single person out on the street. Since when do we live in such a deserted neighbourhood??

I came back home. Still no kids. A little boy that lives across the street came over and was so awesome, he offered to look for them, asked what they were wearing (Pajamas :( ) and off he went. He thought he saw something a couple blocks away, so I took off in my van again, but there was nothing there. Again.

I came back and talked to the dispatcher for 911. She took a better description of the kids, and asked if I could think of where they might be on our street. Jenna's friend wasn't home, so I knew she wasn't there. Our old babysitter isn't home this week either, so I knew that wasn't it. There aren't any other places on our street that they would have gone. The dispatcher suggested maybe they had gone to the park. I immediately said no, that's not a possibility, they aren't the kind of kids that just decide to go for a walk to the park without me. I said that I could see Jenna taking Aidan to the neighbours to see if I was there, but not as far as the park. The dispatcher then reminded me that they had been gone for more than 20 minutes now, and they would have had time to walk there. And I promptly lost it again. From the time I realized they were gone, it didn't seem like more than 20 minutes had passed...and yet at the same time, 20 minutes was a long time. Especially when you're 4 and 7.

About 20 seconds later, I saw the mother of one of Jenna's friends driving up the street. I thought it was strange...since she lives like 3 blocks away, and we don't live on a main street. And then I saw Aidan's face in the back window of the truck. I almost peed my pants with relief. I couldn't get the door to the truck open fast enough. And I couldn't hug my children tight enough.

I still can't believe it happened. I still can't accept the fact that they really are okay.

I also have a few thank you cards to write. My neighbour across the road, who I've hardly ever spoken to, sent her daughter to the park to look for them, and it was the boy that lives there (not her son) that went looking initially. Also, my kids had knocked on Jenna's best friends door, but they were sleeping. And when D looked out her front window, she didn't recognize the kids walking away, she thought the girl was a neighbour kid that has been giving them a hard time. But when she went outside and my neighbours daughter told her who it was. She called, and left a message, and at the end of the message she said, "oh to hell with it, I'm coming over there." And she did. In her jammies. :) Thankfully my kids were back by then, but still. What a wonderful friend. And then there's K. Who is sick as a dog. But called 911, and stayed with Mason, and then drove and drove and drove looking for my children. Who scolded them as I would have, who hugged them as tight as I did.

My head hurts. I guess from the stress of it, and from trying to figure out what the hell would make them go that far!! Jenna said she thought I had taken Mason for a little walk. Aidan said Jenna told him to go :) You better believe though that it will NOT happen again.

2 minutes. that's all it took to nearly lose my children.

It was extra scary for me, because when I was pregnant with Jenna, I could picture her at every age until 7. And then I couldn't picture her anymore. Jenna's 7 now. I've been holding my breath in a way since her birthday. And when this happened this morning, it was like all the air was sucked out of me.

But they are back. And they are safe. And I am going out to buy kid leashes for them I think. :)